Newslined

April 13, 2006

With a major battle impending, civil war emerges






As reported, there is an impending war between sugar and Splenda, and new sources have revealed that the threat is much more serious than expected.

With political unrest and chaos looming, a civil war has broken out on the Coca-Cola camp between original and the Splenda off shoot.

Apparently, within the major battle, a coups has been attempted by Diet Coke, who formed a coalition with Caffeine-Free and Zero.

Dr. Pepper and RC have decided to remain neutral, while Pepsi is looking for whatever opportunities it can take.

Jesus. What next? Blak and Cherry will be going at it? Maybe they'll tell everyone else to fuck off and they'll elope or some shit. If war it is, though, my money is on Cherry. That shit is tastey with a capital T!


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