Bitches: Buy a fucking house!

So mortgage rates are wayyyy down. Like $485 for a $145,000 house. That is DIRT cheap. Get some good credit, and buy a house now, damnit.

Do you want to be paying $500-1,000 rent a month, when you could OWN your own house for cheaper than that? If not, you are retarded.

Seriously, think about it, your own house. No more nosey neighbors tryin to look in on you while you are naked and doing naughty things (damn skank) or the pygmy elephants that live upstairs and make so much noise you want to throw a Big Gulp at them. Plus you could throw lavish parties with strippers (ones without the disease hopefully) and lots of cocktails.